Mother's Day 2012

05/13/2012 13:06:00

Mother’s Day 2012

Hi. My name is Myra Ruth Hall. I am only eight years old in this photograph. I lived in an old wood frame home, off of a clay road, with my mom, dad, five siblings and a dog. I loved my family, friends, school and church. Sometimes, my daddy went to jail. But, I loved him anyway. We did not have a lot of money, that’s why my daddy sold moonshine. Moonshine looks like water, but it’s real stinky and if you drink it, well, it makes you act real silly. My daddy liked to drink his stinky water and my mama would chase him around the porch with a frying pan. Me, my brothers and little sister would hide underneath the house with the dog when mama and daddy started bickering.

Mama didn’t drive, so we would take a bus into town. I enjoyed and looked forward to our bus trips and time together. No big brothers, no clingy little sister, just me and my mama. Sometimes, mama would have a little extra money saved to buy me a pretty new outfit. The ladies and men, in town, always dressed so fancy and I wanted to look fancy too.

Mama always had a garden in the back yard. Fresh vegetables were always plentiful. Collard greens, tomatoes and fried okra were my favorite. The chicken coupe was always full of fresh eggs. Mama chased those chickens around the yard like she was chasing daddy on the front porch. But, I refused to kill a chicken. It didn’t seem to bother mama though.

Sometimes I would just close my eyes, and wish it would all go away. I felt invisible, like no one could see me. I wanted to shine bright, like a star in the sky. Mama was always busy. Mama had six children to take care of, and daddy was either in jail, working or drinking his moonshine. But, I knew that if I got married, all of my dreams would come true. Just like in the movies.

One day, in the summer of 1963, I met a really cute guy. He was in the Army and I fell head over heals in love. I lost my interest in school. Eventually, I got my big brothers consent for the marriage. I became a wife at the age of sixteen and a mother at the age of seventeen. All I ever wanted was love, but some how marriage and children did not fill my emptiness and insecurities, so I began to use drugs. I knew that it was bad, but some how it made my problems go away, temporarily, and made me feel better about myself. I did not want to believe that I had an addiction to drugs, because the medicine was prescribed by my doctors.

Just like my daddy drank moonshine to make him feel better, I took medicine to make me feel better. And, I took potent narcotic/opiate medication for many, many, many years, every single day of my life. Nobody could get me to stop. Eventually, I had to consume a certain amount daily, just to keep me from having seizures and to prevent me from feeling sick. Then, one day, I reckon, my body had all it could possibly take, and I died, at the age of sixty three. Now, I reside in Heaven with my mama and daddy.

This short story is dedicated to my mother, Myra Ruth Hall, as this will be my first Mother’s Day without my mom. Sadly, I lost my beautiful mother on October 19, 2011. Her death remains under investigation.

In my profession, as a Geriatric Care Manager, I preface the need for patient/client advocacy. Too many adults are being over medicated and become addicted to prescribed medication. “Get a patient hooked on drugs and you will have a patient for life”, as I have heard.

Last, for some mother’s out there , your day may not be filled with love, flowers, cards, gifts, hugs and candy. Maybe, you are struggling with addiction. Please know that you are not alone. There is help! There is hope! You are not alone! Please reach out for help. Suicide Prevention Lifeline : 1.800.273.8255

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Mother's Day 2012